Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
My vagina is officially offended.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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