Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
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