Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
stop calling my apartment porn island.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize