Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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