So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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