any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
