wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
