I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
