Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Why is there bacon in the couch?
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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