I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
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But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
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Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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