youre lurking in front of me
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
