Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(850): View more from Florida

Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?

(850): View more from Florida

I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife

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(516): View more from New York

There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.

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(631): View more from New York

Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?

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(907): View more from Alaska

There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.

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25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
Read it at the TFLN blog
(905): View more from Ontario

oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...

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(954): View more from Florida

I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"

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(804): View more from Virginia

i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless

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(757): View more from Virginia

I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."

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