I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
Sober January is a disaster.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
It's official drugs can't kill me
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
