Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
