hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
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