hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Randomize
