Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
