He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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