under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
it's just one of those nights where i don't care if anyone sees my vagina
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Randomize
