do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Randomize
