It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
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I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
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I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
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