Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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