I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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