They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Randomize
