She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
organizing the empties. That sober.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize
