Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
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