I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
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