i threw up in over 4 different places last night. it was like a world tour
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
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