Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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