I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
