The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
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Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
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Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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