READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
But he was wearing a glow-in-the-dark condom. It was like a glowing rod of kryptonite. I can't resist that, kryptonite is my weakness.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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