Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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