Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
I'm at the store buying plan b and vodka
the cocktail of hope
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
Just threw up in a cup driving down the road because there was cop behind me and I didn't want to pull over. Not sure if winning or failing at life.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Randomize
