Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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