i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Thanks for the menagerie of condoms on my desk
It's the use of SAT words like that which make me want to use them on you
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
I have already put on my inside pants.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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