i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
Randomize