I wish they made helmets for livers.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Randomize
