Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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