I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
