I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
