You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize