Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
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She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
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You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war