As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
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