Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
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I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
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I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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