just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
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