Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Randomize
