Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
