I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
