I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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