i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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